It is their punishment for all the evil sins that they commit every
day against men; through thought, word and deed.
It is their punishment from the Lord!
Leviticus 41;3 And the Lord said, "Let their skins wrinkle with a
tiny crinkle for every wicked thought, word and deed in which they most
heinously engage, every day! Let these hideous wrinkles multiply and so
expand their ghastly coverance throughout the years so that everyone can see the
accumulation of the wickedness that burns most horribly within their dastardly
souls - wickedness that only the wise can normally see."
And the Lord then turned to Mocob, son of Macob and brother of Hocob, and
said unto him, "Holy Mocob, is that really your wife? She looks like a
bloodhound sucking a lemon!"
To which Mocob raised his eyes to the Heavens and said: "No, thank
goodness. She is the daughter of Macob, brother of Nabob and son of Nobob."
"You mean she's yourSISTER!?" the
Lord spaketh in horror.
"Sadly, yes," admitted Mocob dolefully. "But she can
"But she's as ugly .. as ugly .. well, .. she's as ugly as sin
itself," the Lord expletethed
The Lord then silenced his birds in the trees with a wave of his hand.
"And you have actually been living with that ... with that thing
... for how long exactly?"
"Since birth? Sacre Bleu. I think there must be some
The Lord shooketh his head in disbelief and silenced his lowing herds in
the fields with a wave of his hand. "No man should have to endure such
suffering," he mutterethed to himself. "The wickedness of women must
be kept hidden from view while their buds are ripe and their juices fresh, or no
man will ever be attracted to them. And then what, eh?"
The Lord scratchethed his head awhile, and silenced his winds with a wave
of his hand. "Aha. I know! I've got it. The wrinkles of humans shall lie
deep within what I shall, henceforth, call a soul. But the wrinkles shall be
added to with every malefaction, and they shall eventually burst forth upon
their faces so that everyone on Earth can recognise 'the evil ones'."
And so it came to pass that the skin of women wrinkled faster than the
skin of men.
On the day of their 50th anniversary the reminiscing wife finds the negligee
she wore on her wedding night and puts it on. She goes to her husband and says,
"Honey, do you remember this?"
He looks up from his newspaper and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that
same negligee the night we were married."
She says, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that
He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember."
"Well, what was it?" she asks.
He's not much in the mood for this, but he sighs and responds, "Well, Honey, as I remember, I said, 'Oh baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those
boobs and screw your brains out."
She giggles and says, "Yes dear, that's it. That's exactly what you
said. So now it's fifty years later and I'm in the same negligee. What do you
have to say tonight?"
He looked her up and down, and replied, "Mission accomplished."