However, I was not impressed with this bit in
the article... "I most likely reminded her of someone from childhood,
probably an adult care-giver who might have been overpowering, neglectful or
abusive. One counsellor had no doubts: "I wonder who she was punching when
she hit you?"
there are no strong reasons to suppose that
maltreatment is the main reason why many women are violent
The implication is that her violent and
abusive behaviour has arisen as a response to some kind of maltreatment in the
past. But there are no strong reasons to suppose that maltreatment is the main
reason why many women are violent and abusive towards others when they get
Indeed, the popularity of this idea has much
more to do with feminist politics and with the abuse industry touting for
business than it has to do with any objective evidence about the matter.
Typically, feminists will always attempt to
excuse the poor behaviours of women by suggesting that somewhere further back in
time there is an abusive man who is responsible for it. And those working in the abuse industry
would lose most of their clients if they, too, did not seek to excuse the poor
behaviours of women in some way.
After all, it is women, mostly, who use their services.
It is women who bring the money in.
However, most of the valid evidence that I have
suggests that many 'aggressive' disorders - like Borderline Personality Disorder - result
more from biology than psychology. As such, while it is certainly the case that many women with BPD
claim that they were abused as children, it does not follow that the alleged
abuse gave rise to their BPD.
women with BPD often live their entire lives
believing that they are the perpetual victims of abuse
Indeed, first and foremost, women with BPD often
live their entire lives believing that they are the perpetual victims of abuse. They are
forever blaming others for mistreating them, and they are also prone to lying
and confabulating in order to pin the blame for their woes on to others. These
women are forever seeking sympathy and are very adept at creating credible
falsehoods about the past in order to cover up their tracks. Furthermore, they will hurt other
people with impunity.
Unfortunately for our society - and
particularly for its men - these destructive women are aided and abetted by
those who promote the view that women who behave badly only do so because they
One of the main lines of evidence commonly
used to support the notion that those women who suffer from BPD were
mistreated when they were youngsters is the fact that, in many cases, there will,
indeed, be some evidence for such maltreatment.
But this is hardly surprising.
Firstly, given that the disorder
undoubtedly has a major genetic component, those with BPD are
very likely to have had parents or siblings with this condition - or something
like it. And such parents and siblings will, indeed, have treated them poorly. But it is their
own genes that
will be responsible for their own BPD, rather than their poor treatment.
Secondly, even 'normal' others can easily be driven to distraction and
can tend toward
aggression - verbal or physical - against children who have the symptoms of BPD
impossible are they to understand and to contain. And so it is that many
children with BPD probably do end up actually being neglected, ostracised or assaulted by
their parents - and by others - who are not afflicted with the disorder.
therapists and feminists have too much to lose by
blaming genes for the poor behaviours of women with BPD
But therapists and feminists have too much to
lose by blaming genes for the poor behaviours of women with BPD, and too much to gain by
blaming others for them. And this, of course, plays right into the hands of
those with BPD - who, somewhat like psychopaths, are only too eager to 'find evidence'
which helps them blame others for their problems.
About 1 million women in the UK and about 5 million
women in the USA have BPD or something close to it. These women are also highly
likely to end up being single mothers.
It is the stuff of nightmares - from which
there is no escape for children, day after day after day after day. These
children are continuously at the sole mercy of mothers who can be unpredictable,
manipulative, abusive and violent. And, to make matters even worse, the children
will be blamed for much of this - especially in later life.
These women are also often heartless, unforgiving,
volatile, hyper-critical and very vindictive
These women are also often heartless,
unforgiving, volatile, hyper-critical and very vindictive, and they often seem
to take great pleasure in inflicting feelings of guilt, shame and hurt relentlessly
upon their own children. (Erin Pizzey calls these women 'emotional terrorists'.)
And yet our courts readily place children
into the sole custody of these women when the fathers finally have no choice but
to leave, or when they are forcibly removed by false accusations levied against them.
Our judges do this to children, you know.
And they claim to do this sort of thing 'in the best interest of the child'.
Well, let me explain to any judges who might
be reading this that somewhere around 5% of the population are
either socially and/or emotionally highly dysfunctional.
Therefore, where children are brought up by
single parents, some 5% of these parents are going to be highly
Indeed, because highly dysfunctional adults
are the very ones most likely to end up as single parents, the percentage of
those children with single parents who are highly dysfunctional must be quite
high - probably many times higher than 5%
Nevertheless, sticking with the overall 5%
figure just to make the point, the probability of children ending up solely in
the hands of dysfunctional parents drops from around 5% (for children of
single parents) to around 0.5% when two parents are around.
As such - and to generalise - whatever
dysfunctional traits, harmful to children, that one considers that parents might
have, it is clearly the case that one of the very best ways of protecting
children from the effects of them is for children to have TWO parents!
Passing The Buck
Disorder (BPD) is thought to originate from early childhood experiences;
significant loss, unstable attachments to parents or parental figures; trauma,
abuse or deprivation. Approximately half of those with BPD were physically or
sexually abused as children."
Firstly, I am really sorry to read about what you have been through in your
own personal life. It must have been absolutely horrendous. It really makes me
feel quite nauseous even to contemplate the stresses that you must have been
subjected to. And I have seen this sort of thing happening to children - very
often, I'm afraid, in single mother situations from which the children have
absolutely no hope of escape.
However, I have a real problem with promoting any group that puts BPD down to
abuse in childhood - as opposed to it being the consequence of genetic
influences and brain disorders.
I say this is because I have witnessed often
enough the development of BPD
The reason I say this is because I have witnessed often enough the
development of BPD - or something extremely similar to it - taking place in a
context where I know for certain that there was no childhood
Furthermore, it is a characteristic of BPD that 'others are always to blame'.
And I am unwilling to promote the view that parents are directly responsible for
serious psychological problems in their children unless there is real evidence of this,
because, for the most part, parents have usually
done the best that they can for them - something that is incredibly difficult to
do when a child has a significant personality disorder - severe in the sense that it is
virtually impossible for a normal parent to cope with it.
For many years we were told that virtually all 'psychological' disorders such
as schizophrenia, Aspergers Syndrome, autism, and even dyslexia, were caused by
child abuse. My own asthma (caused by an allergy to various substances) was once
down to a 'mother complex'. But as medical science develops we keep finding out
that other factors are mostly responsible. And my belief is that the same will
be true for BPD.
This is not to say that being continually at the mercy of relatives who are
emotionally or physically abusive does not have long term deleterious effects.
Of course it does. But I do not accept that BPD is one of the likely
In my view, it just doesn't fit.
Much of the difficult behaviour of those with BPD centres around the fact
that people soon learn to avoid them. As you say, ... "Sufferers of BPD constantly try to ward off panic around real or imagined abandonment. This
results in impulsive and erratic behaviour, mood swings and difficulty with
relationships." ... but I think that your emphasis is completely
wrong-headed. For example, one minute the person with BPD is telling you that
you are the most important thing in the world, the next minute they are kicking
you very hard in the teeth.
And so, of course, it is not surprising that their relationships are highly
volatile and unstable.
In other words, I doubt that they are imagining it.
The manipulative, unpredictable and very often
hostile behaviours of those with BPD together with
their high propensity to lie are direct causes of the very things that they would
claim to fear the most; such as abandonment.
And so, for example, those with BPD would claim that those around them often
lie to them. Well, they probably do - given that this is often the only way that they
can attempt to keep the peace.
But who, exactly, is the 'sufferer'?
My guess is that because three times as many women as men have BPD, they are
deemed to 'suffer' from it, and, further, they are falsely deemed to suffer from
it because of some alleged past abuse. Were the gender proportions reversed, however, my guess is that those with BPD would
be seen somewhat differently - as evil in some way, probably.
Men are criminal. Women are ill.
Men are criminal. Women are ill.
As such, while I do very much respect what you are doing, I think that
through your rhetoric you are, unwittingly, simply creating more problems for
those who have to deal with BPD, because you are laying the blame for it in the wrong
place - thus casting suspicion and/or guilt upon people who have probably done
nothing wrong given the circumstances that they have had to endure - and you
are playing right into the hands of some very uncaring, manipulative and abusive
people, who have not much in the way of a conscience, and who will only be too
happy to see you doing this on their behalf.
In my view, if those with BPD received far less sympathy and far more in the
way of admonishment for their poor behaviours towards others, both they and
their victims would end up being better served, by a long way.
You must always remember that therapists have a vested
interest in claiming that they understand the causes of their clients'
You must always remember that therapists have a vested interest in claiming
that they understand the causes of their clients' problems and, further, that it
is also very much in their interests to both view them and treat them as
'victims'. In fact, without doing the latter, they are unlikely to generate much
in the way of business.
And this is why therapists who are unwilling to pander to the usual abused-in-the-past
theories fade quickly into obscurity while those who do pander to them are eagerly supported
by their victim-client population. This is how bogus therapists end up swamping the whole area with their largely
unfounded ideas and views.
Yes. Children and adults who exhibit dysfunctional personal or social
characteristics are often seen to have been 'abused' in some way - perhaps sexually and/or
physically. But, in the case of those with BPD, there are often good reasons to
believe that any 'abuse' was, in fact, a reflection of the coping mechanisms
of those who actually had to deal with them - mechanisms that might well have met
with some success at the time. (The carrot and/or the stick.)
Furthermore, those with BPD could be pampered
like Lords and Ladies throughout their entire lives, and yet they would
still end up hurting others and claiming that they are victims.
Finally, I would point out that women who have
BPD are undoubtedly a primary cause of domestic violence and homicide, and by
claiming - falsely, in my view - that such women are 'survivors' of abuse in
some way - i.e. they are 'victims' - you not only allow them to escape
responsibility for their actions, but you continue to perpetuate the myth that
men (typically) somewhere along the line, are the major cause of their problems.
In my view, BPD is genetic in origin, and its
symptoms in women are further complicated by PMS and by the way that people who
are close to them end up reacting toward them.
Perhaps, one day, I shall be proved wrong. But
until such a time materialises, I cannot support a site that sees women with BPD
as victims of abuse.
It is those who have to deal with them who are
the victims, and who are the ones most likely to have been abused.
Due to some damage in a certain part of David's brain, though he can visually
recognise faces perfectly well, the emotional connections to those faces have
been severed. And so, for example, when he sees his mother, he believes that she
is an imposter.
reason for this is that while his brain recognises all her visual features
perfectly well, he has no emotional response to them as a result of his brain
damage. And so he sees a woman who looks exactly like his mother, but, because no
feelings are engendered toward this women by his brain, he concludes that she
cannot actually be his mother.
The visual-emotional link has been cut.
the other hand, when David talks to his mother on the phone, not only does he
recognise her voice perfectly well, but his brain also produces the relevant
emotional responses. And so, in the case of auditory stimuli - her voice on the
phone - the appropriate emotional responses are available to him, and he does
not therefore conclude that the voice belongs to an imposter.
David's emotional system does not connect to his visual system.
It does, however, connect to his auditory system.
people will be discovered who have no significant
emotional responses to the touches or the voices of their 'loved' ones.
my view, the same types of finding will be discovered in connection with the
other sensory modalities. And so, for example, people will be discovered who
have no significant emotional responses to the touches or the voices of their
importance to the current discussion, however, is the fact that these very serious
emotional deficiencies can clearly occur because of specific anatomical
'faults'. And given that anatomical faults might well arise from genetic
factors and/or from defects in embryological development, the poor behaviours of
many women can now be better explained without continually having to view them
as the victims of some form of abuse.
Indeed, it is highly likely that in humans
there exists a whole range of anatomical connectedness between emotional responses
and sensory stimuli.
If the appropriate connections between the brain's
emotional systems and the areas that respond to outside stimuli are not
developed properly, the result will be an emotionally deficient being.
this also goes some way to explaining why it is that so many leading feminists
and promoters of man-hatred are clearly not normal.
women with a high degree of emotional disconnectedness
are exactly the kind of women who become radical feminists.
For example, women with a
high degree of emotional disconnectedness are exactly the kind of women who become radical feminists.
They have no feelings for men in the same way that normal women do.
at close quarters, men can sense this, and so they run a mile, which frustrates
and angers these women who then seek their revenge on men in general by doing
their best to hurt them - all of them! - with many of these women actually
working daily in their careers to achieve precisely this aim and also to thwart
the development of the kind of loving relationships between men and women that
they, themselves, can never have.
In the UK, for example, the lesbian feminist
Beatrix Campbell seems to have spent a lifetime trying to hurt men - in my view. She is a
major promoter of child abuse hysteria - particularly in the area of 'recovered
memories' (e.g. see Shameful Therapists)
- as well as a disseminator of lies designed to demonise men (e.g. Slap That Face - Beatrix Campbell.)
with western societies being so heavily influenced by many cold and often very
nasty women, it is hardly surprising to find that we are currently experiencing
so many breakdowns in people's relationships.
Further, of course, such women
are also more likely than normal women to climb high in their careers, because
they are less distracted by matters of the heart.
Needless to say, much of the
above will also apply to men. But the difference is that when men behave badly
western societies condemn them, and their laws try to restrain their bad
behaviours with the threat of punishment. The same, however, does not apply to
women who exhibit the same bad behaviours, because they can nowadays claim that
their bad behaviours are the result of some past or current abuse.
the research of neuroscientists like Professor Ramachandran will help to expose
these women and will help to open further the eyes of the public to the nonsense
propounded by many therapists and the abuse industry.
are some quotes from some highly influential feminists that - in
my view - clearly reveal the emotional deficiencies of leading feminists and
of those women who support them ...
'My feelings about men are the
result of my experience. I have little sympathy for them. Like a Jew just
released from Dachau, I watch the handsome young Nazi soldier fall writhing to
the ground with a bullet in his stomach and I look briefly and walk on. I don't
even need to shrug. I simply don't care. What he was, as a person, I mean, what
his shames and yearnings were, simply don't matter." Marilyn French;
The Woman's Room.
"All sex, even consensual sex between a married
couple, is an act of violence perpetrated against a woman." Catherine
"Men who are unjustly accused of rape can sometimes gain
from the experience." Catherine Comin, Vassar College. Assistant Dean
"You grow up with your father holding you down and
covering your mouth so another man can make a horrible searing pain between your
legs." Catherine MacKinnon
"A woman who has sex with a man,
therefore, does so against her will, even if she does not feel forced."
"To call a man an animal is to flatter him; he's a
machine, a walking dildo." Valerie Solanas
"I want to see a
man beaten to a bloody pulp with a high-heel shoved in his mouth, like an apple
in the mouth of a pig." Andrea Dworkin
"I feel that
'man-hating' is an honorable and viable political act, that the oppressed have a
right to class-hatred against the class that is oppressing them." Robin
"When a woman reaches orgasm with a man she is only
collaborating with the patriarchal system, eroticizing her own
oppression..." Sheila Jeffrys
They have no concept of what it really means to be
felt, touched, or loved by a close other.
It seems fairly obvious to me that the women
above are emotionally castrated in those areas that are involved with love and
affection. They have no concept of what it really means to be felt, touched, or
loved by a close other. And so, for example, when they feel a gentle touch on
the arm by another human, they do not feel warmth, they just feel a touch, For
might as well be the touch of a blanket or a stranger. For them, every
touch is that of an 'imposter'. It has no meaning.
And this is why, for example again, "all
sex is rape" in their eyes.
These deficient non-women do not actually know what sex is.
Sex does not mean anything to
them beyond the orgasm.
They are man-haters through and through
because to them, men - all men - are nothing more than objects to
whom they have no
After all, they are all
And this is why, for example, they have no
concern about men being treated appallingly by, say, the justice system.
It does not matter to them at all
if innocent men are imprisoned for alleged offences against women.
It does not matter to them at all if fathers can simply be kicked
out of their own homes.
These women are very
dysfunctional, emotionally dead and, very often, decidedly malicious.
And yet we, in western societies, have given
these non-women and their disgusting attitudes huge power - power that they use
to damage all close relationships between men, women and children.