Badass

34 Years For Fondling Brian Finkel, a once-prominent Phoenix abortion doctor, was sentenced Friday to nearly 35 years in prison. He was convicted last month on 22 counts of sexually abusing patients. Under Arizona law he must serve at least 29 years behind bars. His sentence could have ranged from probation to 74 years. Joe Blow

34 years for fondling!

Outrageous and barbaric.

Apparently he fondled women who were too reckless in bed to prevent their unwanted pregnancies and who were also prepared to have abortions. And then these same women have the nerve to claim that they are such sensitive souls that his unwanted touches 'wrecked their lives'.

Unwanted pregnancies and abortions. No problem.

Inappropriate fondling. Devastation!

Huh. What rubbish!

"I think he should die there," she said.

He fondled her for goodness sake! He did not cut off her limbs.

Women have far too lofty an opinion of themselves these days. They seem to think that they are goddesses. But these women were no saints.

One minute women are supposed to be as capable and as hardy as men, the next minute - when it suits them - they are suddenly so precious that touching them inappropriately is tantamount to committing grievous bodily harm.

The truth, of course, is that these particular women are just liars and manipulators - and so greedy that they are quite prepared to inflict as much harm as they possibly can on to another person simply in order to get as much money as possible.

Of course this doctor needs to be punished if guilty.

But, 34 years!?

There is a fortune to be had by 'victims' making out that they have suffered deeply. And it is almost invariably men who have to pay the huge price.

34 years?

There is little justice in America these days.

There is savagery, nastiness, hysteria and outright vindictiveness continually being pumped up by feminists, women's groups, victims' groups and huge crowds of legal officials who simply wish to line their own pockets.

And thousands of women every year are taking advantage of these circumstances in order to profit themselves, regardless of the huge injustices being inflicted on to men.

...

Did you know that the "Men's Rights" Google News link generated a whopping 11 items of news a few minutes ago - whereas the "Women's Rights" Google News link generated a paltry 1065 of them?

Women's Rights are clearly now only considered to be 100 times more important than those of men.

Progress!

...

The missus and I optimistically trundled off yesterday evening to see Part III of the Lord of the Rings at the late-night showing of what is euphemistically called 'a cinema' round here. 

(The screen of our neighbour's TV is about twice the size!)

Anyway.

In order to prevent the possibility of the whole performance being ruined by any of the currently mandatory gruesome domestic violence adverts which normally precede all films shown in the UK, the missus decided that it was in her best interests to ensure that I never got to see them - lest I spend the next four hours shuffling aggressively in my seat and moaning about them, thus ruining the film.

And so she timed our most grand entrance into 'the cinema' to occur well after the adverts had finished being displayed.

It was a good tactic!

And it worked!

Regretfully, however, about three-quarters of the way through the film - in fact, just as the King of Wherever was about to be slain by the Evil What's His Name who was flying around on the Whatever It Was With Big Teeth - my bladder could hold out no longer.

Four earlier cups of tea had colluded together and decided that enough was enough. And they insisted most persuasively that it was time for them to move on.

And so I tripped my way through a veritable forest of feet, irritating about 20 people in the process of doing so, and then stumbled haplessly in the dark up the so-called 'aisle' to the Gentleman's Room.

And it was very plush!

But there, on every wall, as I emptied myself peacefully, posters were howling at me.

They were the only posters in the place.

And they were all to do with domestic violence against women.

You know, the usual stuff.

Every week in the UK, 70,000 women are hacked mercilessly to death by wicked men.

420,000 women were grievously molested or raped by their male office colleagues while you were happily carving the turkey on Christmas Day.

Nine million helpless women were brutally assaulted every single day last week in Macclesfield during the lunch hour, not only by close male relatives, but also by passing strangers. 

Some of them were even assaulted by police officers and school children.

And so when I finally returned to my seat, I looked dolefully at the missus as she polished off the last remaining crumbs of my popcorn.

The King of Wherever was already dead. The battle was over. And, according to the missus, the best part of the film had come and gone during my absence. 

And so with uncharacteristic vigour and enthusiasm, I whacked her about the head a few times with my left shoe before sending her off to buy me some chocolate with which to comfort myself.

Jack Bauer 

The Truth!

Killing Jack Bauer doesn't make him dead. It just makes him angry. 

If Jack Bauer was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and Nina Meyers, and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he'd shoot Nina twice. 

If you wake up in the morning, it's because Jack Bauer spared your life. 

Superman wears Jack Bauer pyjamas. 

If it tastes like chicken, looks like chicken, and feels like chicken, but Jack Bauer says its beef. Then you better believe it's beef. 

Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys. 

1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight. 

Let's get one thing straight: the only reason you are conscious right now is because Jack Bauer does not feel like carrying you. 

Jack Bauer was never addicted to heroin. Heroin was addicted to Jack Bauer. 

Jack Bauer played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won. 

When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer hates lemonade. 

Jack Bauer once won a game of Connect 4 in 3 moves. 

Osama bin Laden's recent proposal for truce is a direct result of him finding out that Jack Bauer is, in fact, still alive. 

Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men. 

Jack Bauer doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was shooting at another terrorist twelve miles away. 

When Jack Bauer was a child, he made his mother finish his vegetables. 

Jack Bauer killed 93 people in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact. 

Simon Says should be renamed to Jack Bauer Says because if Jack Bauer says something then you better do it. 

Jack Bauer won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal. He thinks yellow wristbands are gay. 

When Jack Bauer pissses into the wind, the wind changes direction. 

Jack Bauer's favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent. 

When you open a can of whoop-ass, Jack Bauer jumps out. 

When Google can't find something, it asks Jack Bauer for help. 

You can lead a horse to water. Jack Bauer can make him drink. 

Jack Bauer can get McDonald's breakfast after 10:30. 

When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Jack Bauer. 

Every mathematical inequality officially ends with "< Jack Bauer". 

In 96 hours, Jack Bauer has killed 93 people and saved the world 4 times. What the hell have you done with your life? 

Jesus died and rose from the dead in 3 days. It took Jack Bauer less than an hour. And he's done it twice. 

Jack Bauer killed so many terrorists that at one point, the #5 CIA Most Wanted fugitive was an 18-year-old teenager in Malaysia who downloaded the movie Dodgeball. 

In kindergarten, Jack Bauer killed a terrorist for Show and Tell. 

What color is Jack Bauer's blood? Trick question. Jack Bauer does not bleed. 

Guns dont kill people, Jack Bauer kills people. 

If Jack and MacGyver were locked in a room together, Jack would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out. 

People with amnesia still remember Jack Bauer. 

Sun Tzu once wrote, "If your enemy is weaker, conquer him. If he is stronger, join him. If he is Jack Bauer, you're f***ing dead." 

Jack Bauer literally died for his country, and lived to tell about it. 

Jack Bauer has been to Mars. That's why there's no life on Mars. 

Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. Jack Bauer laughs at Superman for having a weakness. 

When Batman is in trouble, he turns on the Jack Bauer signal. 

It took Jack Bauer two minutes to beat a confession out of OJ. 

If Jack Bauer was gay, his name would be Chuck Norris. 

The bumper sticker on Jesus's car reads, "WWJBD?" 

Jack Bauer was conceived by torturing the other sperm until they gave up the location of the egg. 

After 7 minutes of interrogation at the hands of Jack Bauer, Tom Cruise admitted that he was gay. 

Jack Bauer's family threw him a surprise birthday party when he was a child. Once.